Tomorrow is 20 years since I married my soulmate in the romantic village of Gretna Green.
Our family, both of our parents and our friends and family came with us to celebrate our special day.
We were just 21 and 23. Our whole life ahead of us. We had just moved in together and were saving to buy our first house.
Life was so simple then.
Fast forward 20 years and life is far from simple.
Tomorrow we won’t be going back to that pretty little romantic village as we have a few times since. The last time when our youngest was just a baby and we had dinner in the same restaurant we had our wedding reception, which was so special.
We won’t even be going out for an anniversary meal or toasting our milestone anniversary with our Bride and Groom champagne flutes.
We’ve sent eachother cards and he has sent me homemade gifts. We will have a phonecall tomorrow but nothing more.
Prison is the wall that divides us.
Being a non offending partner or a prisoners wife in general is heartbreaking.
Choosing to stand by your partner and process the anger, shock and disbelief at what’s happened to your life, feeling cheated out of that life that you had is soul destroying.
Our wedding anniversary tomorrow will not be the same. Nothing is the same right now.
I hold on to the belief and hope, that one day, one day it will all be worth it and we will be a happy family again.
After the knock 
Your life will be better very soon, it won’t be the same, too much water under the bridge for that. We all thought life was good before the knock it clearly wasnt… the lies, the secrets, the shock when our worlds all went up in smoke. Trust me when I say it does get better, lots better. No lies, no secrets, just a simpler life with a smaller circle of people who matter and respect you around you. I came to a place today and I was emotional… The last time I was here, I returned home and the knock happened the next day and everything in my life seemed like a lie. Today was another one of those landmark days for me… to return to a place I never thought I would come to again. Very soon you will make that journey to Gretna Green with your husband and the people who matter around you and you will celebrate the vows you made, the life you had and look forward to the next chapter. Xx
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Thank you hunny 😥💖💖💖
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